grounded (ˈɡraʊndɪd) adj
1. sensible and down-to-earth; having one’s feet on the ground
And when people speak about someone being ‘grounded’ from a principles perspective, they’ll be referring to how well (i.e. clearly and deeply) that person understands how they’re creating they’re experiences via the principles. This groundedness usually means that that person is compassionate towards themselves and others, is calm about life’s ups and downs, and tends to communicate more authentically and therefore effectively.
I’ll start with a disclaimer: I’m not a huge fan of the term ‘grounding’, the way I hear it used often suggests a permanent destination, a goal or some kind of grading system which to me is SO not the point (and yeah, I know that’s just my thinking)! Instead, I tend to speak about seeing the principles clearly, and the moment to moment nature of that clarity.
But we’re friends, right? I’ll use ‘grounding’ because it’ll save you from having to read a whole chunk of words to replace it all the way through this post.
This isn’t a one-time deal
It’s truly a moment to moment thing. I recently heard the utterly wise and wonderful Judith Sedgeman talk about grounding thus [I'm paraphrasing here as she talked brilliantly about this for several minutes]: “It’s simply about having peace of mind in the moment.”
The most grounded of people can have moments of brilliant wisdom and humbling compassion but can have other moments of mortifying awfulness – it’s just that the more clearly one understands the principles, the less those awful moments occur. And the less they’ll mean anything or feel mortifying.
Fundamentally we’re all working the same way: all of us experience moments of high consciousness and moments of low consciousness, and all of us are feeling our thoughts – that recipe ain’t going to equal a lifetime of non-stop deity levels of splendour, it’s not meant to, we’re here to be human (although it’s astounded me how the human existence can be sooooo much happier, easier and richer than I ever believed was possible).
So, in conclusion: a grounding is just about how clearly and deeply one sees the truth of how we all create our experiences of life. Seeing that now you see it, now you don’t – and seeing that in itself, accepting that unacceptable paradox, is part of seeing the whole.
So what IS the big deal about the Holy Grail of grounding then?
It’s that grounding is as close to a magic bullet as it’s possible to get.
Want to get clearer on your purpose? Get a deeper grounding.
Want to have a better relationship with your partner? Get a deeper grounding.
Want to be less worried about money? Get a deeper grounding.
Want to be less stressed? Get a deeper grounding.
Want to be more confident in your work? Get a deeper grounding.
Want better sex, an Aston Martin and to lose the muffin top and/or beer belly? *holds the mic out to the crowd* Get a deeper grounding.
It’s not that a deep grounding provides all of these things out of the box, it’s just from that place of having clarity and peace of mind – all those “How do I…?” questions just get answered. Or often, they just don’t seem to need an answer because the question becomes unimportant once the insecurity driving it has fallen away.
Man, I know it can feel frustrating when you just want a cheeky technique, a tricksy tip or a guide to ‘Improving your sex life in 5 easy steps’ to solve your problems but really and truly, you KNOW by now that those feckers never really work – not for long anyway.
The gift that keeps on giving (but only if you notice it giving)
Your grounding will serve you over and over again in every situation, in every walk and every age of life.
Sounds too good to be true? I guess it kind of is if you’re expecting to see the truth of the principles once and for that glimpse to be enough to transform your life for the rest of your days. If you bounce off joyously into the the world full of people who think that we work outside-in, never thinking about or speaking to anyone about the principles again, chances are your understanding isn’t going to be as clear as it could be – i.e. you’ll feel less grounded.
Simply put, this is an understanding that grows clearer and deeper the more we look in the right direction to see it. I love the way Michael Neill talks about it as “…staying in the conversation”.
Make the time to be still and to listen to your wisdom. Notice how thought is the ever present factor in your every experience. Speak to a deeply-grounded coach or a facilitator. Gift yourself the time to step out of your day to day life and to immerse yourself – retreats and immersion days (unsurprisingly) are fabulous for this. Just follow your wisdom and see where it takes you.
There’s no end to seeing new things about the way the principles create our reality. I nigh on had my head blown off with an almighty new insight at a recent retreat and it’s given me a depth of understanding that I didn’t even know existed.
Oh go on then, here’s my top tips